In this rainy night of September, when the rest of the world is sleeping, my own world is crumbling down.
I went out with some co-workers tonight and saw my boyfriend with another girl. I saw him kissing and adoring another woman in a way he has never done with me.
I didn’t have the strength or the courage to confront him. I couldn’t. I mean, how could I face the cheating jerk over the sound of my heart shattering into thousands of pieces?
I ran out of there. I ran until I was out of air. Somehow I made it to the building where I live. I walked up the stairs to my flat. Opened the door and without turning the lights, I let the tears flow. I cried over my lost dreams and hopes. I don’t know how long I sat in the dark, I but finally took a grip on myself, and somehow managed to get to the bathroom. And this is where I am now. Staring at my reflection in the mirror, only to confirm my fears. I am a mess. My nose is red, my hair is up in a tangled bun, and my mascara has colored my skin with dreadful black stain. I can’t help but feel sorry for myself. I reach for my make up bag, and I see the sleeping pills the doctor gave me a few months ago.
“Why don’t I finish it all once for all?” I ask no one in the room.
Then pride strikes
“No, not for you or the bimbo you are cheating on me with” I reply to myself. “God, I’d do anything, I mean, anything to be happy,” I say with a final sight.
Suddenly, I notice the silvery silky moon’s reflection in the mirror.
I keep staring at it feeling transfixed. Feeling its magnetism hypnotize me.
Then I realized that there is no possible way the moon can be reflected in the mirror’s bathroom because this bathroom has no windows.
I turn around just to be sure that someone, somehow, hasn’t opened a hole in the room. But all I see it’s the white wall looking back at me. I look back in the mirror, again, and the moon is still there in the mirror defying logic.
The moonlight spreads on the mirror, but now it is invading it all. Its light is so strong I can’t stand it.
The light spreads with the force of a flood. It blinds me, and I feel a strange force pulling me into the light. It swallowed me and spits me into darkness.
I can’t see anything but shadows.
When my eyes adjust to the gloom, all I can see is a pool, a gigantic emerald, illuminated by what it seems floating lamps.
I walk to it, still, confused and too shocked to make any sense of what just happened.
Did I have a stroke? Or Did I just simply die?
I stare at my reflection, and I am startled to realize I am wearing a tunic. I look up, and I see roman columns surrounding this place.
“There is nothing to fear. This is just a dream,” I say trying to reassure myself despite the trembling of my body.
And then someone calls my name.
“Emilia” hisses a voice.
“Who’s there? I ask, and I see a shadow getting closer.
“Emilia, there is nothing to fear,” the shadow says.
But these words just sent chills down my spine.
“Who are you?” I demand faking bravery.
Coming slowly out of the gloom illuminated by the lights I see a gorgeous man dress in a white tunic that seems to glow, his eyes are as bright as diamonds but have no life in them.
“Emilia, there’s nothing to fear,” he says.
“Who are you? And where am I? What’s this place? I yell at him.
“This place is the answer to your prayers” He answers calmly.
“Anything makes sense, and who are you? And how do you know my name? I say while barely holding myself together.
“I’m your guardian angel,” he says, smiling while showing teeth that resemble fangs. And, although, His face is as beautiful and lighted as the full moon, something in him feels as dark and sinister as death itself.
“Stay,” he simply says.
“Where am I..!!?” I shout this time.
“Where you are doesn’t really matter because you’ll have it all here,” he says.
I look at him, and I realized I’m unable to tear my eyes off him, I feel entrance as if I were out of my body.
“Remember the tears, the pain, the loneliness, if you stay, it all go away,” he says seductively “This place is the answer to your prayers, be a good girl and stay” he hisses into my ear.
I might be making a pact with the devil, but the pain is unbearable. I just want it all to go away. I just want it all to disappear. I want to disappear.
“I’ll stay” I finally say and close my eyes as if the world were to disappear at that very same moment. And when I open them, the creature, whatever or whoever it was, is gone. I’m here alone.
But the sounds of voices and steps bring me back to reality.
I see soldiers coming towards me. They surround me.
“We have found her, sir” one of them barks.
He is not speaking in English but, to my surprise, I do understand the words that are coming out of his mouth.
“I should just have gotten back when I had the chance,” I think to myself when I realize that, at least, ten soldiers are surrounding me.
Then they break the circle to let a kind looking old man in. And for a reason I can’t understand, I feel relief to see him as if my heart knew who he is, however, I don’t.
“Emilia, my child,” says the man on the verge of tears “What are you doing here? We’ve been looking for you for hours. I almost lost my mind. But it’s all good now. We’ve found you, my dear. My child,” he says and lovingly caress my cheek.
I don’t know how to respond. I just look at him trying to calm down my trembling body.
“My child, you’re shivering,” he says and then barks some orders to the men, who hand him a cloak immediately.
“Put this on, my child and let’s go home, mamma is worried sick about you.”
“Mamma is worried sick about me?” the question slips out of my mouth because in the “real world” my estranged parents have never really cared much about me.
“Of course, my child,” he says “your mamma, and I love our daughter so very much,” he says and hugs me and, to my surprise, I abandone myself to the unfamiliar sensation of protection.
I am his daughter, I think to myself. No, Emilia, you are not his daughter, he thinks you are, but you are not I remind myself.
“Emilia,” he says letting go of me “dawn will break soon, and the citizen will start filling this place,” he says while start walking.
“What’s this place?- I ask.
“Emilia, my child,” he says while smiling, “it’s true, you are a lucky girl. You have your own bath at home, but, at least, I’d expect you to know the public bath where your father conducts business and meets the most important in town” there is no judgment in his words just sweetness.
We step outside to find a magnificent carriage waiting for us.
The kind old man barks some more orders to the soldiers who have been following us all this time. And they all go to wherever they came from. Aware of our presence, the driver jumps off to the ground to help me get in the carriage. Once inside, the old man hugs me to keep me warm. I can’t help but fall asleep in his arms.
The midday sun wakes me up, and I feel dizzy.
“It was all a dream,” I think to myself. I sit up, trying to calm my head. And to my surprise, I’m wearing the tunic I was wearing in the dream.
It doesn’t make sense at all.
“My God, it was all real” I shout while a panic attack starts crawling up my chest strangling the air out me.
People come in running.
They are all wearing tunics similar to mine. A lady pushes her way in, but nobody seems to take offense.
She pulls me to her and starts rocking me from one side to another. The panic attack is slowly retrieving. The lady notices my calm breathe and slowly unties our hug.
“This always works like a charm,” she says while pulling my hair away from my face.
“Thanks,” I reply awkwardly.
And then I realize that all eyes are on me, twelve pairs of eyes, just staring. But then I see a familiar face standing next to me, my father, because I am his daughter, aren’t I?.